Schecky Moskowitz, a deservedly-struggling young comedian, lands a menial job on the cruise ship that's holding the Miss Universe pageant. The Big Man On Deck for this voyage is Dickie Diamond, the ship's comedian and all-around ladies' man. As an assorted array of thugs, Panamanian mercenaries, and terrorists try to storm the ship, Schecky hopes for one big chance to prove himself and enter the exciting world of cruise-ship comedy.